TO TWEEDLEDOM

A musical look at the harmonions also known  as the tweedles -by princess joannakathryn

THIS IS SUNG TO THE TUNE OF "cHICAGO, cHICAGO!"

 

 

Harmony, Harmony, that tweedlin' town
Harmony, Harmony, the Tweedles abound.
Everyone's a doofus, a dimwit or a twit in Harmony.
Harmony,  the town that the forces of evil can't shut down
 
 

             Tweedledee and Tweedledum, set out to have a battle.
             For Tweedledee said Tweedledum, had broken his new rattle.          Lewis Carroll

It's a little known fact that Lewis Carroll based his stories, in his Alice in Wonderland  books, about these two brothers on some real- life characters.  Their names weren't really Tweedle, but they should have been.  And they weren't fighting over a rattle, but a woman.

Anyway, the two brothers moved to a little coastal town called Harmony.  They proceeded to each marry and have children, lots of children, both in and out of wedlock.  That brings us to the present day, when everybody in Harmony is related to each other and a direct descendant of the original Tweedle brothers.  Only, unlike the royal families who intermarry and in the process develop their jug ears (well, Sheridan obviously needed a little tuck) and receding chins, the intermarriage in Harmony produces gorgeous, young looking people who look to the same age as their children.  Unfortunately, Harmony is overstocked on village idiots, since the brain cells tend to recede.

Grace is Tweedledee, but she is also a Tweedledynamo sometimes, especially when she plans the flea market during  the same days that she loses her sister to a fire and sees her niece put in the hospital.  She even baked the cakes for the sale.  And made tomato-soup cake for a formal dinner.

Faith is Tweedledumb.  All she did was wring her hands and say “You might be the forces of evil!”  She was afraid Miguel might be evil, so she wouldn't go to the door, but sent her daughter instead.  DUMB!

Charity is our Tweedledumpling.  She’s just so sweet that you want to pinch her head off. (and stomp on it a few times).

Sam Bennett, with his doofus hair is Tweedledoofus.  Why he likes the “Something about Mary”  look is a puzzlement.

Tabitha is Tweedledemon and Timmy is Tweedletwerp or Tweedledoll, depending on how he is acting at the moment.

Kay is working toward ‘Demon2, but for now she’s Tweedlediablita (little girl devil).

Miguel is Tweedledip.  Is that boy ever going to open his eyes to Tweedlediablita’s meanness?  She’s done everything but try to kill Tweedledumpling, but he still says, “Oh thanks, Kay.  You’re a real friend.”  --or--”You’re probably right,” as she tries yet again to stop him from seeing ‘Dumpling.

Pilar is Tweedledowncast.  Doesn't the faithful family retainer bit get a little old after all these years?  How many times does she have to evade the truth by saying, "I cannot say."  And the accent is fake sounding.

Eve is Tweedledoc, of course.  And T.C. is Tweedlejock.

Sheridan is Tweedledilettante.  In the beginning, all she did was worry that she’d be killed like her friend Diana.  Now, she worries about her past.  Hey ‘Dilettante, get a grip.  The world doesn’t revolve around you!

Luis, for his arrogance, can sometimes be a Tweedledickhead (no pun intended.)  But at times he is Tweedlehunk.

Simone is Tweedle-enabler, for letting Kay push her around and even hitting her without mopping up the floor with her.

Whitney is Tweedlewhiner.  She needs to get a life besides tennis and binge eating so she can stop worrying about Tweedletwit being in love with Tweedledimwit.  How many times  can she say, “Theresa, you’re going to have to forget about Ethan”?   Now it’s “Simone, stop thinking about Chad.”

Ethan is Tweedledimwit.  He thought Theresa was stalking him, when he went to her in all the places first,  so he proved himself to be not the brightest bulb in the four pack.

Theresa is Tweedletwit.  “Oh Ethan, we’re meant to be together,” as she busily knits her eyebrow into her hairline (not much of a stretch!)  Somebody introduce that girl to Nair.

Chad is Tweedledirtbag.  He can scream about being picked on but he seems to go looking for trouble.

Reese, whom we haven’t seen much lately, is our Tweedledork.

Gwen, as she tries to swallow Ethan’s face, is Tweedledo-me.  (Maybe she needs a Tweedledildo!)  

Hank is Tweedleloser.  Cute, but obviously after somebody else’s money.

Frank--As hard as he tried, was Tweedledunno.  Did he ever think to check the employment records at the cannery or the Burger Hut?  Still, sorry to see him tweedle away.

Our unseen Alistair is Tweedledictator.  He seems to call the shots for everybody, but WHERE is he?

Ivy is turning into Tweedledevious, as she plans to make a play for Tweedledoofus  under Tweedledee’s nose.

Julian is Tweedlediabolical, because he seems to care for no one but himself.  The word “smarmy” fits him so well, that maybe he should be Tweedlesmarmy, too.

There’s only one Harmony resident I haven’t come up with a Tweedle name for, and that’s Jessica.  As young as she is, she sometimes comes across as the only one who can see through Kay.  She did act bratty at the beginning, so we’ll call her Tweedlebrat, with the option to change it later.

And finally, the name TweedleDITZ is reserved for the writer, James Reilly, as he continues to drag out these storylines.  Speed it up, Jimbo!

HARMONY--it’s a Tweedlin’ Town. . .. .  .. .

I am Joannakathryn, Tweedleprincess

 

Well done, my princess-it was tweedlicious, just like that tomato soup cake!